Book review 14: How to be happy though married

Book title: How to be happy though married

Pages:160

Author:Tim LaHaye

I am not married yet 😅 but this didn’t stop me from devouring this book. Tim LaHaye is a pastor and counsellor who openly discusses issues on how two Christians can write and overcome their issues in a practical manner.

The book is centered on how two Christians unite to form one spiritual, emotional, and physical body .Each chapter explores a key, giving scriptural backup,counselling experiences and realities,sealing it with research.

The keys include; opposite attract where he explores various temperaments (more on this in his book,spirit controlled temperaments).couples ought to know their temperament and understand it.

Key 2: Forget yourself.My favorite quote ,”do you want your wife to treat you like a king?then treat her like a queen!!”

“Most counsellors acknowledge three basic areas of marital adjustment -mental,physical and spiritual.Proper adjustment in each of these areas is necessary to create a well rounded marriage.”

The author raises must answered questions, “how do you socialise when married?is appearance important in marriage?how much information to give away to outsiders?how to raise children,church to go to and so much more. He offers answers and real examples from various couples he has counselled which makes the book very practical.

He takes time to talk candidly about sex,goes to length to give a detailed explanation of how the male and female body behaves during sex.

This book is highly educative with a balance of research from various authors and the greatest author -God. Being a Christian,the Bible verses and revelation put perspective on each point.

I highly recommend this book to all those courting and intending to marry, marrieds,marrieds mentoring other young couples. This can be used as a study book.

I recommend it for ladies who need perspective on information they get in bridal showers, relationship conferences.

Book image: bookdepository.com

Extraordinaire 8: Live Martha

1.Who is Martha?

Martha Ainomugisha Mugisa is a Leadership Development enthusiast who is passionate about empowering others. Her heart is sold out to youth, children and the vulnerable. She’s been married to Gideon for the last 8 years and is a mother to 2 precious girls, Hannah and Hadassah! She loves a good read,travelling and having a good hearty laugh!

2.Genesis of Livewire.

The first LiveWire forum was held sometime in 2012. Early 2012, I was visited by 3 young men who I had mentored years back. They were at a point in their lives when they were completing university and they felt we needed to meet, catch up and chat like old times and especially talk about issues of love and relationships that were a puzzle to them at that point in their lives. We agreed to meet over some nyama choma like old times. Two weeks to our meeting, a few other friends from the good old times showed interest in coming so we opened it up and decided to find a venue, and do logistics for a real meeting. I think we had over 30 young people in attendance. At that meeting, it was agreed that another meeting should happen. When I met with the initial 3 guys for an evaluation meeting, we agreed to tentatively call the meetings live wire and this is why: I had met these precious people during a time when I worked with Scripture Union Uganda. They used to volunteer during youth conferences during which one of the most popular parts of the program was a session we called live wire (intended to mean that things were discussed as openly and bluntly as could be). And your guess is as good as mine, the hottest topic during live wire at the conferences was relationships, love , sex and everything in that line. So, without really planning to, we started having regular meetings. The name has still stuck. It was only modified to The LiveWire Forum”. We have debated over the years on whether to change it but well, let’s see what the future holds. The Spark team(a group of volunteers who plan and execute the forum’s activities) was constituted and here we are. The rest, like they say, is history.

3.How do you juggle livewire and your day to day life of being a mother and managing other ventures?

From the very start, we appointed a team of volunteers to plan and execute the activities of the forum. This means that the burden does not lie squarely on my shoulders. So I have learnt to empower others to be part of the work so that the responsibility is not heavy. As earlier said, this team of volunteers at LiveWire is called the Spark Team! There is also a group of married people who are burdened about this ministry who have come on board over the years. We call them “Elders”. They are a great source of encouragement and support.

4. How often is LiveWire held?

We hold 4 forums a year usually around March, July, September and November. The November forum is custom made for those planning to walk down the aisle. It’s code-named “Planning To Say I Do”. This September our forum is happening on 30th,dubbed ,”lad_lady in Waiting.”

5.Achievements so far?

The testimonies of impact are so many. That is what has brought us this far and gives us the grace to keep going. We have interfaced with over 500 young people over the years. Seeing young people finding courage to face tough situations, make tough but life changing decisions, arise to pursue their dreams or deciding to live right is what we live for at LiveWire. Also, we have since defined our niche and focus and also gone on to expand our scope of reach. The LiveWire forum is now a program under a registered non-profit, IGNITE Initiatives (www.igniteinitatives.org), whose vision is to empower the next generation of influential leaders. We are excited about what the future holds!

6. Challenges faced.

Like earlier stated, the start of this forum was not planned. It really just happened. So, along the way when it became clear that we needed to keep going, my team and I had the challenge of deciding where we wanted it to go and how. We have had to go before God to give us direction and guidance. We have had to embark on Long term thinking and planning. This process is actually ongoing. I like what the future looks like. Our other burden and challenge has been follow up. In this kind of work, you must follow up on people and build support systems if you are to have long term and meaningful influence and impact. But because this is something we do part time and with a small team, it’s been a challenge. However, since we have decided to think long term, we are working on processes and systems to help us be more effective.

7.How does one join the forum?

LOL!!! you don’t have to recite any creed OR be a certain way. Are you a young person keen on making godly decisions on matters of love, relationships and marriage OR are you keen on discovering God’s purpose for your life and pursue it? Just attend one of the forums or join us on the WhatsApp group and you will officially be part of the family.

8.What advice do you give to youth who are struggling to find their purpose?

My first word would be breathe in and out and go easy on yourself. Every single person you see around you goes through that phase at some point in their life (especially those who seem to have it all together)! Now, you won’t believe it but your purpose is closer to you than you think. All you have to do is look around you and inside you. I believe and have come to appreciate that our purpose is woven intrinsically into every fibre of our lives by God our creator. Who you are; your personality, likes and dislikes and your experiences in life will quickly help you define your purpose if you take a close enough look. So a good place to begin is by asking the one who made you- God. In simple terms, pray about it.

9.Social media sites

Whatsapp: https://chat.whatsapp.com/KHHqtln3GQt1sJ541y1n1T

Facebook:https://web.facebook.com/groups/244871502271995/

Twitter: @LiveWireForum

Join us!!!

©Racheal Kizza 2017